Why Does He Do That?

Why Does He Do That? reveals the nature of male abusers, ways to identify them early, and how to respond to their threats.

We may think that childhood trauma, emotional wounds, or broken homes are the catalyst for abusive behavior. In reality, although they contribute to this issue, they aren’t what turns a man into an abuser. Instead, his role models and influences are responsible for it.

A boy’s education forms while watching the adults around him. Children observe very carefully and absorb everything they see. Therefore, when a boy sees his mother acts like a servant around his father, he’ll think that all women should do the same.

Even worse, if a boy catches his father abusing his mother verbally or physically, he may replicate this behavior with his partner later in life. Studies show that nearly half of the men growing up in abusive homes end up being the same.

Just like role models, social media and news can influence behavior and negatively affect teens. Therefore, boys can pick up aggressive patterns and inclinations from influencers that praise male power or artists that promote the aggressive alpha-male in their songs.

Just like a condition, abusive behavior has its symptoms. Avoid getting trapped in such a relationship by learning how to recognize the warning signs and act on them as soon as possible. It’s easier to detach yourself from the beginning than later in the relationship.

One of the first alarming signs a man can display is speaking disrespectfully and resentfully about his ex-partner. Although he may not praise that person, he shouldn’t degrade her. Another big no-no is a man that paints himself as a victim falsely accused of abuse.

We sometimes crave the comfort of safe and loving relationships, which leads us to believe in false promises and overlook negative signs. Abusers may promise a future together from the early stages of your relationship only to claim ownership of you.

Another forewarning could be a false sense of generosity or receiving favors you don’t need. This can make you feel uncomfortable and indebted. This subtle yet alarming sign should make you consider withdrawing from the relationship.

Abusive behavior is learned and inherited, and that cannot change. Although you may hear promises and witness small acts of change, they don’t usually last long. That is because change has to come from within and doesn’t rely on extrinsic factors. According to the author, most men don’t commit to long-lasting changes. Moreover, they are reluctant to make them in the first place because it makes them feel like they are losing power and authority. They then turn on their victims and makeup excuses. The reason why imposed change is impossible…